You're trying to justify this desire men have to women, seems like. Like a lot of men, you seem to think I we don't understand. It's you men who don't understand.

You can opt in and out without censure. You're the only ones stopping you from promoting your own sexuality. You want it to happen but you don't want to put the effort in to be pleasing. You would never accept that side of the scrutiny and so it doesnt happen.