You make some good points, though instead of framing this as an us vs. them dynamic, maybe we could show some compassion to both sides. We’ve all grown up in and been shaped, normalized to, and influenced by this culture. Which means getting out of it is a process. Women who to back to abusive men do so because they don’t know what real love looks like, because getting out isn’t easy and there’s little support to do so, etc. It’s not unusual for it to take several attempts. Sometimes you just need quiet so you can get out of panic mode and figure things out. Quiet isn’t always easy to come by.

Men need help too, to dismantle the poor thinking. They need to know how and why their thinking and behavior is off. They need consequences for choosing bad behavior, not excuses, because these things feed themselves and get worse over time. They need to understand the dark aspects of their own nature and what drives that nature past healthy boundaries, how to re ognize it within themselves and the other men they engage with, and how to handle themselves in that situation.

And yes, there is a dark feminine as well. Same thing.