You know, she covered your point nicely in the article; that NPD as a clinical diagnosis means you have to hit many on a list of specific behaviors.

She is a clinical psychologist.

Further the term narcissist exists outside the realm of clinical psychology and has for centuries as a term for over focus on oneself and/or their appearance. It is not incorrect to use the term in that context and not mean that someone is a sociopath or meets clinical criteria.

The nuance is in the details.

Frankly, most people have gone through periods where they’ve been over focused on themselves. We’ve all been narcissists just as we’ve all been belligerent (overly stubborn about something).

It’s not the same thing as saying you have NPD.

Someone who wakes their partner up in the middle of the night repeatedly to get something out of them is not thinking about that partner’s well being. They’re overly focused on their own desires of the moment to the detriment of the partner.

They have excessive interest in their self.

How is that not narcissism?

It may or may not follow that they have NPD.

Referring to someone as a narcissist when they are acting out the literal definition of the word is not wrong. Nor is it part of a perceived culture to hate on men. It’s just good English.