You flipped things and then criticized the author based on things she never said.

The friend didn't claim to want to avoid being married and having a child but not want to be a wife and a mother. She was lamenting on whether it was possible to do so without it being an unequal burden on her as compared to the husband. Nowhere in there was anything said about avoiding family responsibility altogether. The only thing that was said was "unequal burden".

The answer for most of us is no. You can't avoid it being an unequal burden.

The friend wanted to propose, she was not wanting to be proposed to. It was the man, her fiance, that wanted to fall back to traditional roles of the man proposing, the thought being that if he was prolised to, it would be emasculating to him because he would become the butt of a never ending joke amongst their family and friends. This leaves her stuck feeling unable to pursue what she wants to do because of worry he'll refuse based on those gender expectations. Yet his personality is such, that he may never ask himself. Too shy or reticent.

The author then speculates on whether or not the traditions surrounding marriage press people into gender roles outside their inherent nature that in turn, ruins many a marriage. The answer again, is often yes. It does.