That sounds like a you problem. You thought of feminism as something to serve you, selfishly, rather than a way to live your life.

Selfish people are always going to be disapponted when they discover that little to nothing in this world is completely about them.

You'll be disappointed again because you're still approaching your "transition" from a selfish frame of mind.

It's not all about you just because you're performing "feminine sacrifice" for status and attention either. Surprise.