Take your own advice. She/He didn't absolve the mother at all.

Fact is, they're divorced now. It is not the mother's job to parent the kid during the Father's time at someone else's house.

He is absolutely labor dumping or just not parenting.

What happens at the mom's house is absolutely on the mom, AND it's clear, based on ehat weve been told, this child is dealing with emotional abandonment feom having one or both parents being addicts. Probably both.

Doesn't negate the fact that when she's with him, any parenting choices or needs are on him to step up to. Dude dropped the ball multiple times. This isn't an oopsie. It's a demonstrated pattern of behavior over an eztendee period of time.