Or.... Do it like I did. When you get ready to have kids slash your expenses down to the absolute bare minimum, take all the extra work you can and sock away resources.

Hit yard sales and second hand places and get baby gear without paying premium price for it. Be mindful of what you actually need and what's being pushed at you. Took me 3 years total.

Then go out and get pregnant the old fashioned way or pay a guy for his sperm. This allows you more genetic choice as well as you set romantic considerations aside. That could be taken badly so let me clarify that I am NOT talking about eugenics or supremacy philosophy.

As an example, chronic allergies run in my family. I have them too. I chose someone with no family history of it because there is thought to be a genetic component to the severity or chronic nature of some allergy sufferers. My child has zero allergies.

As another example, I can see someone who is very much into sports choosing for athleticism, someone who is a STEM professional choosing for analytical intelligence, someone who works with animals choosing for quietness and compassion, or a creative choosing for creativity.

It's no guarantee of course, but you can hedge your bets somewhat. You still have to back it up with the right environment while the child is developing.

There are a lot of pluses to SMC. In many ways it is preferable and negates a lot of the super harsh societal pressure for it to be more normalized.

To be fair though, there are plenty of people out there who revel when thinfs get hard for you because they believe you deserve it.

There are men out there who want to be fathers too who can't find someone they want to partner with either. If both parties opened their minds a bit, it's *possible* to build a co-parenting relationship or maybe even agree to 2 children. One for you and one for him.

Honestly, once you set romantic notions aside, the possibilities really expand.