Of course I read the first line. It's just hollow and empty when it's followed by the "what about society and male suicides" whataboutism spiel.

It's a deflection. It's equivocation. It says, "you're right. It's sad. It's so sad that it has to be that way. Tragic even. But .....women should still accept this dynamic and submit to it for the greater good. And you'll benefit too, somehow, maybe some day."

That song and dance is just too old. As is your attempt to make it all about you (men). Alimony is rarely awarded anymore. If it is, there's usually a time limit to it. Or it's a kind of payment plan to balance out IRA investments which usually are via the husband's job. As for child support, male complaints about that just show how blisteringly ignorant they are about what it takes to raise a child. That's what happens when the day to day is handled by one partner.

As for lost access to your children, custody usually goes to the primary caretaker. If men were more involved in the day to day and didn't so often use the kids to come over unannounced and gaslight and browbeat their ex-wives that wouldn't happen either.

I've heard this song and dance for years from men too. Mostly, men I've worked with, during break times. When you start asking some pointed questions, it's not long before it's clear that these men have done nothing to make the process any easier or more equitable and they have refused any suggestions to do so. Time and time again.

This is a cop out so these men can act like petulant brats and pretend to be victims to justify the lying and betrayal of the marriage that got them there in the first place.

Weak. Pathetic. Lazy. Dishonorable.

Now, obviously this does not apply to all men. There are plenty of men who have found themselves in divorce court having never broken their vows. They've been to counseling, they've negotiated, they haven't used their kids to get back at or control their ex-wives, they've put the kids first and stepped up. My hat's off to these men. You've been through the wringer and made it through honorably. Well done. I wish you the best for your future.

Nor does this dynamic make women angels. There are plenty of women who behave just as abominably. They're an embarrassment to their gender, parenthood, and humanity. They're manipulative, selfish, lazy, entitled, and often cruel; they have no honor. To them I say the same thing I say to the men who act that way. Get over yourself and get some therapy. You don't deserve the love and respect of those children when you use them to manipulate, scape goat, or create a victim narrative to make yourself feel better.