No, she knows. She also knows I offered co-parenting because he said he wanted to be a father. She knows who he is and he was in her life for a short while.

She also knows the lies he told in the community and to his church, saw his behavior and mine, and who kept true and who didn't.

When people ask her is she misses not having a dad, she usually says, "can't miss what you never had" or "I've seen enough fathers of classmates and friends to know I'm not missing much".

She spent her early childhood in the evangelical south, which explains a great deal of that answer.

If I had it to do over again, I don't think I would have attempted to include him in her life and I'm not sure I would have even told him.

I don't know, maybe that's too easy to say with hindsight.

I do think it's important for children to have a good paternal figure. Urchling has her Granddad, a good friend of mine, and 6 really great step uncles.

So.

I also truly believe that it's better to have no dad than a bad dad.