No, no excuse. Wasn't implying that. I'm just saying the bullying dynamic goes both ways and wherever you stand on the beauty divide or the performative femininity divide, somebody's gonna get up in your grill and run their damn mouths.

We know this. It's bad enough when it comes from men but they're men and we understand it for what it is.

It's betrayal when it comes from another woman. Don't you think? Of a sort? Betrayal of you because you're not their kind of woman, sure; but also betrayal of themselves because they're choosing the misogyny they must also reckon with and betrayal of women because it ensures that even amongst ourselves none of us will ever be good enough.

Honestly, given your description, I think a lot of it is the accent and the way men respond to it because I get a lot of the same thing and I never wear heels or makeup. It's bizarre how men will fall all over themselves for a southern accent. I also deal with a lot of pushiness that markedly increases the minute a man hears me speak. It makes other women jealous. It does.