John Henry and I have gone back and forth quite a bit now. I agree with you about that forced politeness, but he's fairly new here. I did offer to link him some resources of men helping men because there are a growing number of them out there. He hasn't asked for them. That's interesting, because he then later described himself as a former "nice" guy during an exchange where I referenced an srticle I recently wrote and briefly detailed another exchange I had with a different guy a few hours earlier that very day and contrasted the two. My point was that just because he sees these guys as nice decent guys doesn't mean they're treating everyone that way. He hasn't mentioned if he read it or commented on it either, but when I asked him a clarification question about what he meant in another comment, he gave a short, rather circular answer and referenced another article he wrote, no link or title, just a generic desceiption. I'll look for that article once inget to work, while I'm waiting on the reports, but I'm not really expecting any real engagement or reciprocity at this point.

It just always seems to come down to the same thing, doesn't it? Some guy makes a fuss about men and their mental health steuggles with loneliness, with the framing of women won't have sex with them or give them a chance. They just want the same chance other guys seem to get. Whatever chance you give them, whether it's a huge investment in your part or a crumb to seenif they're serious, they don't take it. In the end, they don't see your personhood and they don't care about you. They care about what you can give them. If you didn't have something they wanted that gives them status, they wouldn't even see you.