It’s a form of armour. Wear your armour. If people don’t like seeing you in armour they shouldn’t come at you with knives.

Your article really resonated. I remember every bit of this from my own teenage years. The constant fucking nitpicking was brutal.

These days, I have a teenage daughter of my own and the comments have returned, only now it’s false sympathy because it must be so hard to have a teenage girl, we must fight so much, she must be so hard to control, am I okay with her wearing/saying/doing that?? Does the dog have to hide when we’re both on our periods?

Jeez. 🙄

Like they think they’re going to coerce me via social expectations of politeness into shredding the self esteem of my own flesh and blood.

Bless their goddamned hearts.

I am not my mother’s generation and I remember. I remember well. Every cut.

Fuck. That. Shit.

As much as I would like to tell you that it will end soon, that would be a lie. The nitpicking particular to teenage girls will come around again if you become the mother of one.

But.

You’ll be more prepared to respond with force, grace, sass, humor, rage, whatever feels right to you. You’ll be less inclined to worry about getting in trouble or unduly caring if you hurt their feelings or something. You’re also less likely to gaslight yourself that an appropriately sarcastic response to a boundary violation and societal scorn is too much. Also there’s just going to be so many things like that, overall, you just don’t fucking care about anymore (once you realize you caring doesn’t make any of it any better). Best for last, you’re going to get your chance to protect the next generation; you’ve got a while to hone your skills and your own weapons so mind the 3 F’s.

Be fierce.

Be feral.

Be ferocious.

Go get 'em Warrior.