I missed this when you first wrote it.
This was a lot. You make some good points again. But they're also bad ones.
Like the guy who "helpfully" points out that a pregnant woman's statistical likelihood of dying in childbirth is really quite low.
Technically, factually, statistically he is correct. It's true.
But we already know that and he's an asshole for saying it because that's just the worse case scenario, not the whole of the anxiety around going into birth.
Yeah, maternal mortality might be beoufht up in discussion because it is the worst case scenario with the most profound consequences everyone can agree is bad. Hard to argue.
But all the other ones routinely DO get argued against and dismissed and in bad faith mind you.
Ultimately, it comes down to loss of trust. And that's a direct result of cultural changes in men's dating behavior. Before the manosphere and PUA, a guy might come up to you and hit on you and you say no thanks and he goes away. No problem.
Women didn't worry about being murdered, or nowhere near as much.
There was a basic level of trust that you were genuinely safe in public spaces. That if anybody went too far, someone would intervene and help you out. That was the basic belief.
As an example, compare that to going for a walk in your neighborhood and seeing a stray dog. You see the dog and the dog sees you. The dog has it's head up, it's ears are friendly, and it's tail is wagging. Do you immediately jump to "this dog is going to attack me!"
No. Most likely your first thought is either concern for the dog being lost and hungry or you just go about your business.
That's how it was.
But I'm the recent past a few changes have taken place in men's behavior. Let's list a few.
1)Men have adapted a pracocking type tough guy persona to impress or exhibit status. They all around with a Kubrick- like glare. They have cast aside a friendly and open facial expression in favor of this new presentation. Even when approaching a woman looking for a date. Not smart.
2) they have gotten in the internet in hordes and published underhanded, manipulative, and coercive strategems in order to trick sex from women. These strategems have been widely applauded by even more men.
Women saw these published guides too and then we all startes to notice these behavioral tactics being attempted against us.
3) What used to considered locker room talk is now also taking place on the internet and due to anonymity, it's escalated as well. Again, to thunderous applause. I cannot stress how much that basic level of trust wis and was deoendent upon the widespread belief that others, in general, mean you no harm. And how much the raging and virulent misogyny on the internet over the last two decades has destroyed that.
4) Candid cameras have repeatedly shown that the blind assumption of intervention in a developing dangerous situation has been falsely placed. Women protect or attempt to protect more women than men do. Repeatedly, men turn away and conveniently don't see anything. Specific examples include watching a man spike a woman's drink, seeing someone coming unglued and raging at someone else in public, not checking clearly harmful and threatening language amongst a peer group (like rape jokes). Commentary on such clips routinely excuses or makes light of clear and present danger to women by many men. Women see all of this too.
5) Add in the results of increased homelessness and overall inebriation on the streets. Drugs and alcohol lower inhibitions and a lot of people are just mean drunks. The homeless literally have nothing to lose and often will harass women because women are more likely to report to police and they want to go to jail for food and shelter or to get away from another threat on the street.
Now let's do a contrast with our stray dog in the street. Let's imagine that instead of the friendly outgoing dog we saw before, the dog has it's head down, it's tail is straightened and unmoving, it's hackles are raised, it's showing its teeth and low growling.
What's your first thought? "Oh! Poor thing!! I wonder where it's owners are?"
-or-
"OMG, that dog is going to attack me!"
But your statistical likelihood of being attacked by a dog has not changed, my guy. Clearly you're overreacting. Calm down, you're hysterical. 🙄Yay. Now we all have to listen to the lunatic ramblings of yet another screeching harpy-man with an opinion, demonizing all dogs.
Sorry. I'm being an asshole to make a point. (Not sorry).
The lived reality is that we don't face statistical trends in real life. We face individual situations. We have to make sour of the moment judgements based on what criteria sctuslly are present in the moment, not what the overall statisticsl trends are. And men, have culturally changed from behaviorally presenting themselves as that open and friendly stray dog in our first example to the aggressive and threatening stray dog in our second example.
And you're using statistics to blame women for responding appropriately to the current behavioral cues, which signal threat by their very nature, they have been presented with. And men in general are falsely accusing women of demonizing men. Don't want to be 'demonized'? Stop acting like demons. Go back to being open and friendly. Set aside the Kubrick glare and other predatory facial expressions and body mechanics. Stop talking about dating and courtship in terms more appropriate for big game hunting.
You are not predators and we are not your prey.
If you're going to insist on continuing on with that nonsense, well then, don't blame the rabbit for being terrified of and running from the fox.
Regardless of what the ststistical likelihood is that the fox will actually catch and kill the rabbit.
Just saying.
