I get your point too, and the author’s. I just think it’s a failure of people, not a failure of feminism. Feminism hasn’t changed that much in it’s ideology and goals. Each wave has their own targets and steps, but overall the goal has always been the same.

We’re failing as an audience. We’re too passive. We don’t think critically about source. Lots of times we have no meaningful way to check. We’re not limiting and tailoring our experience. We’re not demanding the damn algorithms be open book and changed. Etc.

We’re also not checking our own biases. For example, instead of trying to convince your son that there aren’t deranged feminists out there who want to kill him simply because he’s male, have you shown him some of the stuff directed at women and asked him if he relates to or agrees with those posts? If he thinks that’s right and okay?

Then it wouldn’t be what some "women" are saying, it would be about some "people" are doing to scare other "people" and cause them anxiety. Show him some stuff on bots and fakes too.

It really helped with my kid after the whole UCLA girl drama on YouTube. She really thought if she said something stupid around an Asian male for a while that he would gang up on her with a bunch if his buddies and rape her till she was dead. She was having nightmares about being run down for weeks over that. Several years ago it was “why are Asian people so mean?” Now she’s watching a subtitled Korean comedy and laughing till the tears roll. All her favorite comics are Asian or Pacific Islanders that nobody else over here has ever heard of. Her TikTok account is full of Asian creates media.

I can’t help thinking that this desire to learn about Asian cultures and love of Asian media wouldn’t have come about if she hadn’t had the courage to face that fear, been guided in a manner that was good and receptive for her, and wanted them to know that one dumb blonde does not speak for or represent all blondes or American girls.