Hands down, most women desire the same things in a mate that you have listed for yourself.

This whole narrative you have described is coming from other men and advertising/media to make money on male insecurities.

Not women and not feminists.

Therefore, it is not the fault if women that men feel bad. They should listen to actual women more and influencers/dating coaches less. They should reject this inane ideology along with patriarchal, or more accurately, dominance hierarchy thinking.

And you shouldn't be playing into it like it's a real thing.