HA! If a man wanted to validate my self esteem, he'd buy me a bouquet of wrenches like I asked for instead of roses with baby's breath and perfume since I'm highly allergic to both as is widely known.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but demonstrating that someone is feeling heard and cared about an integral part of validating their self esteem?

Most men buy these gifts in service to their own ego. They're showing off. No hate, I don't blame men for this. Lord knows they're incredibly pressured to do these things. To the point that they can KNOW from having grown up with you and witnessed multiple allergic sneezing fits that send you to the nurses office in school and they will STILL show up on Valentine's Day with a stuffed doll drenched in enough cologne to leave you with a sinus infection for two weeks. They'll do what they're "supposed" to do to get attention and sex, and that script .UST be adhered to.

And it's a two way street. I know a married couple who only have sex 4 times a year. Guess when that is? Valentines Day, His Birthday, Father's Day, and New Year's (the gift comes at Christmas).

Isn't that sad?

That's what prescribed gifts attempting to "validate someone's self esteem" will get you.