As a woman, I categorically refuse the blame, the shame, or the guilt some guy somewhere thinks should be levied at women for collapsing birth rates.

There’s a whole lot that can be done to ease the burden and cost of child rearing across the spectrum. Government mandates and programs, sure … but also occupational, educational, social, familial, and individual.

I also agree that birth rate reduction globally is better for the planet so I’m on board with that. There are other ways and frankly, better ways to support an aging population than placing the burden on the shoulders of the unborn. For example, food and health initiatives designed to increase the health of the population. People will be productive longer with sound environmental policies as well.

I had one child. One replacement. Neither of my siblings had children. So my one child carries the family line and legacy. One child is what I could afford. I’ve carried that financial and time burden without a partner, almost 100% alone. I’ve gotten less than 5k in familial help when desperately needed over 15 years. I’m better off than many many other single parents who spend debilitating amounts of resources trying to secure support from absentee and dead beat parents. Some of those single parents are actually grandparents or aunts/uncles.

That right there says a lot. It’s too easy to shirk responsibility and deny support. It’s too hard for people who don’t want to have children to access means of prevention. There is too much stigma and opinion around complex issues and few attempts at actual solutions.

Fact is, as a society we don’t care about children. In our laws, our culture, our economics, our education, our vocations, our future, etc. They are the last thought in all of these arenas. Yes, even education.

With all of these aspects of society stacked against child rearing, it’s small wonder women aren’t exactly thrilled over the prospect of large families. The fewer the better.