Again, I'm not talking about you individually. I made that clear. I'm talking about as a group: non-complementarian Christians, taken as a whole. Of course, as with any group, there are outliers, in this case you would be an example. I've been around Medium long enough to have seen your articles and see that you are a consistent writer both in volume, and ideology.
Perhaps because you have been more vocal in dissent, you're not seeing yourself as part of that group or as non Christians and women Christians see you. There is and always has been too much niceness around theological arguments that are dehumanizing within the ranks of Christianity. Who tells the leader he's off his rocker when that happens? The pope is a good recent example. What was it he came out and said recently about women at the University of Leuven? Basically that we need to accept the roles God meant for us as wives and mothers? That it's "ugly" when women try to be a man?
I know I love being reduced down to a broodmare and accused of trying to be a man when I strive for more than that. That last bit is more directly a slight on Transgenderism, for sure, but it also works as well to keep women under the boot of male (supposedly) "divine authority" because it suggests we are outside God's purpose for us and God's going to get mad unless we women are all wives and mothers. It doesn't matter what we want for ourselves or how we feel we are best suited to live our lives. No. Spread your legs and start popping out babies. Hallelujah. Amen.
In the end, the population is about a 50/50 split male/female. That means following this mandate from the Pope, not actually God, will mean roughly everyone pairs up. One man. One woman. Praise Jeebus.
And then, because of male violence against women, (I'm using US statistics because that's where I'm from and what Google pulled up more readily), we may logically infer that:
2.2 per 100K will die of femicide at the hands of their male partner. That's 34% of all women killed per year, because the Pope says we have to be wives to be cool with God. No matter the condition or circumstances. We can pray that men will treat us better. Otherwise, we can absorb that violence because we need to put our faith in God.
16.7% will be viciously beaten by those husbands. Looking at you, Oklahoma.
Some portion of the 35.6% of American women who will be raped, will be raped by those husbands. Remember? The ones we have to be wives to in order to fulfill our purpose. Remember those guys? Remember that survey where all the men were super fuzzy on consent, a lot said a spouse cannot be raped because the marriage is consent to whatever thr man wants, and more than a few said sexual violence is justified in some cases, like to save the species? Remember that? Now I wonder where some of those ideas came from. Hmm?
God's purpose for me is to be raped, beaten, and murdered? Really? The pope just reported that mustard seedling really good, didn't he?
Femicide is a long running silent epidemic. Femicide is a Christian issue.
So where are all my good Christian brothers clapping back against this complementarian nonsense? Loudly, rebukingly, persistently. Where are they? The only chorus I hear on the male side of that equation is a cricket chorus with a few male solos, rap-o-logues here and there, like yourself. Overall, the silence is deafening and speaks volumes. ¹1
But there's always a whole lot of tolerance for the casting of mustard seeds that will inevitably grow into violence against women when those violence inspiring beliefs are "sincerely held beliefs" or "Christians shouldn't fight amongst ourselves, nothing (really, no one. No one with breasts anyway) is worth being divided".
It is not enough for non-complementarian Christians to not be complementarian.
In thd end, the Pope's Wreckless (deliberate) and callous words are mustard seeds of violence that will play out on the lives and bodies of women. And so is that cricket chorus from men Christians, in general.
In general non-complementarian Christians cannot be trusted any more than complementarian Christians now openly advocating for all forms of violence because when push comes to shove, as has been demonstrated time and time again throughout history, you will sacrifice women and 'the othered' to protect and preserve the institutions of Christianity and the men who run them as well as the veneer of "christian brotherhood" over facing the truth and actually walking with christ.
Every. Time.
In the face of burnings. Fields of disposed, mutilated, female bodies. Hangings. Public floggings. Mass rapes. Mass murders of women. Torture deaths from denial or reproductive health care. Throughout history, not only have Christians been there, complementarian or not, they have more often than not held the branding iron or the whip, tied the noose, or carried and lit the torch. Whatever it takes to protect that power structure. No. matter. what. No. Matter. Who.
God wills it, does He not? What else are women for? After all, we were built for it, right? And we deserve it because of Eve, right? The favor ALWAYS goes to Adam, does it not? And if, as a woman, you are ever shown favor by God, it's always on taking your chances upon the birthing bricks as a vessel for the real goal. Maybe you'll live through it and maybe not. God's will be done. One thing is clear, nothing else about you is of any consequence, ever. Be glad to be that sacrifice, O women of the world! Rejoice!! For the Lord is King.
You cannot earn back what you never had. Women have never been able to trust Christians, complementarian or not. Like anything else to do with Patriarchal structures, in the end, there's just surviving it. As Beth Moore (like every other pick me) eventually found out. At best, you can turn away, turn your own blind eye and appease while other women suffer so you can save yourself.
What you should not do, as a woman, is ever trust a Christian. Christianity, like every other Abrahamic faith tradition, is not and never has been for you. It's about using and dominating you to benefit men. The first woman who was sacrificed in a femicide was Yahweh's wife, Asherah.
How could Christians ever be trusted by women? Your very foundations are built upon the spiritual blood of a femicide. That's that very first mustard seed. Through the centuries Christians have made sure that ground has been kept fertile. Gotta make sure that sprout grows, right?
You cannot regain women's trust. You can fundamentally change who you are are and what you cultivate and earn it, in earnest, uncoerced, and without the threat of violence if women don't comply.
For the first time.
